No way. Don't even go there, John, she's just a kid!

Oh look, it's Torchwood, jumping the gun yet again.

I like jump ropes.

It's not Torchwood, it's Gwen, and I only jump the gun for you. You ought to be flattered.

Somehow, in your hands, I imagine jump ropes are anything but harmless.

Gwen! How am I supposed to learn anything if I don't ask questions?

What are jump ropes?

You're absolutely right. It's good to ask questions. I'm just not quite sure about the person you are asking.

Oh, jump ropes are... ropes that you jump. You hold one side in each hand and swing it around and jump over it. They are quite common on my planet as childhood toys.

Why not? He seems nice enough!

He does seem nice. That's part of the problem. He's also likes to cause lots of trouble.

Oh, I'm very flattered. And I like how you're thinking.

I figured you'd come around one of these days.

Though really, harming anyone was the furthest thing from my mind when I said 'jump rope.' Honest.

I believe you. I was thinking more along the lines of you doing anything with a jump rope besides jumping with it...

Oi, now you've got me thinking rude thoughts!

Oh live it up a little, I imagine they're quite fun thoughts.

I suppose.

Prefer handcuffs myself, though.

Handcuffs are good. I was trying to sound innocent. It's very hard work.

Handcuffs?

I don't think I will ever be able to take anything you say as innocent.

Why jump ropes?

Because they're usually not too stiff.

...is that a pun?

No, no, usually I like things very stiff. So it might be irony.

Oh.

But you're a man!

Why yes I am; undeniably male, and quite fond of it.

Why?

When are you from?

6012, New Babylonian calender.

Why? What does that have to do with anything?

And you don't know about sex? And options?

Your father is a caveman.

I know about sex!

It's necessary for reproduction and it's good for military tactics. See? I know!